the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
we're so committed to being not committed
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