addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
