Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
COCAINE IS GR8
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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