why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
