haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
