i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
