yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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