Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
