at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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