Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize