I hate your face
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
it's like iHOP with fire
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize