His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
