i permit you to call me
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
vagina is talking i cant
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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