No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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