Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(661): View more from California

Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.

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(518): View more from New York

after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.

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(407): View more from Florida

I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like

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(864): View more from South Carolina

If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"

(1-864): View more from South Carolina

as in "white"?

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(847): View more from Illinois

Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"

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(406): View more from Montana

You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways

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(803): View more from South Carolina

I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.

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(407): View more from Florida

I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.

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