we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
