Heybabeimwearingurpanties
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
