She's JV to your varsity
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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