I don't usually arrange sex via text message
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Randomize
