Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
