If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
