I must be too annoying 4 u.
we have pet lesbian snakes
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize