Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
