Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
no. you can't hotbox the world.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
