if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
