We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
