Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
