and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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