it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
