I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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