Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
