it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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