id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Randomize