Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
