Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
