do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Randomize