So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
he had hair everywhere except his balls
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
