just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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