is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Randomize
