My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
