guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
my sisters under your porch take her home
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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