can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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