I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
