Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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