so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I'm always down for nudity.
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