kristin has been a bad kristin
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
