Buhtt sex?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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