Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Mom said you looked used
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
