now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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