The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
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